"Fatboy": an Autobiographical Fantasy

Great.    Another millionaire jackass politician being paid millions of dollars for his lying autobiography.

I'll bet Fatboy Teddy Kennedy mentions Mary Jo Kopechne just as many times as Bubba mentioned Eileen Wellstone and Juanita Broaddrick in "My Lies" and Hillary mentioned Monica (et al) in "Lying History".


What else might be left out / glossed over?

His expulsion from Harvard in 1951?
  (for cheating)

Why the US Army denied him a commission?
  (cheating, again)

Why he was nicknamed 'Cadillac Eddie' in law school?

   (cited four times for reckless driving -three times in 1958 and once in 1959- running red lights and driving with his lights off at ninety miles per hour in a suburban area. Teddy was convicted of three violations and fined, but for some reason -can we guess why- his driver's license was never revoked. Not even later, when he killed Mary Jo.)

How Daddy Joe bought / procured a Senate seat for Baby Boy?

   (when JFK became POTUS, his Massachusetts Senate seat became vacant. But Teddy was not eligible to fill Bro's vacant seat until February 22, 1962, when he would turn thirty. So Daddy Joe persuaded the Massachusetts governor to name a Kennedy family friend to fill out Jack's term, keeping the seat available for Teddyboy.)

"Look, I paid for it," Joe explained. "It belongs in the family."

How about how he tried to sell this country out to the Russians?

(In 1983, Teddy-boy offered to assist Soviet leaders in formulating a counter-strategy to President Reagan's foreign policy and to complicate Reagan's reelection.) [The Crusader: Ronald Reagan and the Fall of Communism, by Paul Kengor]

Some suggested Titles:

If I Did It    (sorry, taken);

A Bridge Over Troubled Water    (sorry, taken);

No Right Turns Since Chappaquiddick   (definite possibility);

Booze, Broads and Bridges   (has a ring to it);

and my personal favorite - Fatboy: an Autobiographical Fantasy

"Do we operate under a system of equal justice under law?

Or is there one system for the average citizen and another for the high and mighty?" -- Edward Kennedy, 1973